Apr 18

Feeding Tube DietBrides can drop a quick 20 lbs. in a crash diet involving a feeding tube up their nose for 10 days.  They’re fed a drip of protein and fat mixed with water.  And it’s always exciting to see which bridesmaid catches the IV bag.
(The Real Story) 


 

Dorito TacoNorth Korea’s new leader addressed his nation for the first time, vowing to place top priority on their military.  While he shares dad’s desire to build up the military, he’s mostly doing it so they can invade and get Doritos Loco Tacos from Taco Bell.
(The Real Story) 


 

Iron ManDisney will co-produce the next “Iron Man” movie with a Chinese partner.  Chinese audiences love the character because they fantasize about ripping him apart to sell as scrap metal and feed their family for a month.
(The Real Story) 


 

Kim KardashianAn announcement was made that no one was murdered in El Salvador Saturday!  It was the first homicide-free day in nearly 3 years.  That would be like us being able to announce a Kardashian went 24 hours without screwing an athlete.
(The Real Story) 


 

pterodactylA sleepy Air Canada pilot mistook Venus for an aircraft and sent his airliner diving toward the Atlantic to avoid it.  Not since he thought a moth was a pterodactyl brought back through time had he taken such dramatic evasive actions.
(The Real Story) 


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)
©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com    @TheStilesFiles

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Jan 24

Newt GingirchA Russian scientist published what he claims is evidence of life on Venus.  Its atmosphere is carbon dioxide, it’s waterless, volcano-riddled and 894 degrees.  Experts say the only life that could survive in that hostile an environment is Newt Gingrich.
(The Real Story) 


 

JuddsA tour bus carrying country music star Lee Brice caught fire outside a restaurant near Phoenix, forcing he and his crew to flee.  Not since the Judds reunion’s tragic hairspray incident of 2010 has a country music tour bus been so flammable.
(The Real Story)  


 

MC HammertVanilla Ice’s DIY home improvement show is starting its 2nd season.  And unfortunately for a fellow 80’s performer’s catch phrase, Ice starts out each episode by yelling, “It’s hammer time!”
(The Real Story)  


 

rain cloudA newly proposed law in South Africa would punish unauthorized weather forecasts with up to 5 years in jail time and $630,000 in fines.  That’s why every South African forecast calls for a 1-99% chance of rain.
(The Real Story)  


 

MadonnaDays after the accident, docs found a 3 1/4-inch nail in the middle of an IL man’s brain.  They got it out, and also lucky for him, the only memories damaged by the nail were of Madonna’s Golden Globes acceptance speech.
(The Real Story)  


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)
©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com    @TheStilesFiles

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