Feb 16

Tom BradyAll the remaining candidates can tout first place finishes in at least one state, except for Ron Paul.  Despite heavy investment in caucus states, he has yet to win one.  That’s okay.  Tom Brady can’t come in first anymore but he still keeps trying too.
(The Real Story) 


 

TwinkieWorkers at Hostess, maker of Twinkies, Ho Hos and Wonder Bread, have threatened to strike if the company imposes “unfair” contract terms like wage cuts.  Most workers are rejecting “all the cream filling you want” as part of their official compensation package.
(The Real Story)  


 

OprahOprah got in trouble with ratings company Nielsen for specifically encouraging Nielsen families to watch her new interview show on OWN.  Obviously it was also wrong of her to offer free cars to every Nielsen family who watched too.
(The Real Story)  


 

WD-40Director Michael Bay plans a 4th installment in “Transformers.”  This one is going to have lots of obvious product placement in it…mostly WD40.
(The Real Story)  


 

Robin WilliamsLast week, a video surfaced claiming to show a live woolly mammoth crossing a river in Russia.  It became an Internet sensation, but turned out to be a hoax.  Turns out it was just a Robin Williams movie.
(The Real Story)  


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)
©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com    @TheStilesFiles

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Feb 07

Kim ZolchiakA stomach virus hit passengers and crew on a Princess Cruise Lines ship sailing from south FL.  The Norovirus causes vomiting, diarrhea and stomach pain.  And the crew is even trained to resist such things using Kim Zolchiak’s CD.
(The Real Story) 


 

Keebler ElfA family out gathering mushrooms huddled lost near an OR forest for 6 days.  The couple and their 25-year-old son drank from streams and took shelter in a hollowed-out tree.  They stayed in the tree believing elves there would bake fudge-striped cookies and feed them.
(The Real Story)  


 

stoningA NC woman read the Bible to her attacker for an hour and a half after he slashed her throat.  He listened to the verses carefully, apologized and left.  Sadly, having been given other ideas from the Bible, the man later returned and stoned her.
(The Real Story)  


 

Helen ThomasA study by Match.com found that self-described single, conservative Republicans are more likely to achieve orgasm during sex than any other political persuasion.  Naturally, because liberal Democrats feel a sense of entitlement to an orgasm.
(The Real Story)  


 

wrestlerA Newark man died after a tussle with a former high school wrestler he tried to rob of his cell phone.  He was put in a headlock strong enough it choked him to death.  No charges were filed, because in all fairness, the robber never tapped out.
(The Real Story)  


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)

©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC

www.mikestiles.com    @TheStilesFiles

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Dec 13

Bookmark the main Stiles Files site for the 10 funniest things on the web daily

 

Mitt RomneyAt the GOP debate in Des Moines, Mitt Romney tried to get Rick Perry to bet him $10,000 he was wrong about something in Romney’s book.  Then when Perry refused, Romney put a cigar in his mouth and lit it with the $10,000 bill, laughing maniacally.
(The Real Story)


 

MercuryIs a cloaked alien ship orbiting Mercury?  A solar flare appears to hit a hidden object cylindrical on either side with a shape in the middle.  If it is a ship, it’s probably full of elderly aliens who wanted to be near Mercury to escape the harsh winters.
(The Real Story)


 

Easy Bake OvenResearch found the culprit of a 2009 E. coli outbreak was prepackaged cookie dough.  77 people from 30 states became ill from the bad batter.  If this is the case, how did countless generations survive the Easy-Bake Oven?
(The Real Story)


 

Hulk HoganHulk Hogan is suing his ex, claiming she lied about him having homosexual encounters in her new book.  Um, when you wear shredded red and yellow tank tops, you pretty much have to expect us to assume there was at least some homoerotic activity going on.
(The Real Story)


 

Vegas signRunners who participated in the Rock ‘n’ Roll Marathon in Vegas say water passed out during the race made them sick.  The drinks came from lined trash cans filled with hydrant water.  And, it being Vegas, runners were obligated to a 2-drink minimum.
(The Real Story)


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)

©2011, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com
    @TheStilesFiles

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Jul 22

The Blog Monologue

 

geographyA report shows about a fourth of American school kids scored “proficient” or above on a 2010 geography test.  Sadly, the kids who did well in geography didn’t do as well in English, so they have no idea what “proficient” means.


 

Sarah PalinFootage of a 20-30 ft. long creature caught on tape by fishermen in AK shows it has a long neck, a horse-like head, large eyes, and back bumps that stick out of the water.  But the strangest thing about it is that Sarah Palin hasn’t shot it right between the eyes yet.


 

Erin MoranHappy Days” cast members who sued CBS over merchandise profits got checks for a fraction of the amount they say they’re owed.  The suit has continued even after it was explained to actress Erin Moran over and over again that nobody bought a Joanie lunch box.


 

German SausageThe number of German nudists is steadily dwindling at a rate of 2% per year.  There’s really no room for both the words “nudity” and “sausage” to be so prominent in German culture.


 

Rich coupleTampa police have begun crowd management training for next year’s Republican National Convention.  Mostly, it’s about how to handle crowd control if delegates are served the wrong kind of wine.


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)

 

©2011, The Stiles Company, LLC

www.mikestiles.com    @mikestiles

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