Skechers will pay $40 million to settle unfounded claims Shape-ups help people lose weight and strengthen muscles. They can easily come up with the money thanks to their new line of Hook-ups, the shoe that’s guaranteed to get you sex.
(The Real Story)
The adviser that vetted Sarah Palin for John McCain said even though they lost, he stands by a “high risk, high reward” philosophy. He suggests Romney pick Jennifer Aniston.
(The Real Story)
350 lb. Bill Wisth is protesting a WI all-you-can-eat restaurant that cut him off after eating 12 fish. They gave him 8 fish to go away, for a total of 20. My God, Free Willy never ate that much fish.
(The Real Story)
Topless dancers at the Crazy Horse nightclub in Paris have gone on strike, saying they aren’t being paid enough. And do you really want to go see replacement strippers when they’re called “scabs?”
(The Real Story)
A VA community is securing drug compartments in ambulances after a string of thefts of Versed, an anti-anxiety medication. Apparently, trying to figure out why “ambulance” is written backward on the hood causes a lot of anxiety.
(The Real Story)
Don’t be selfish…make a habit of sharing this with your friends, many of whom could seriously use a laugh.
(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)
©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com @TheStilesFiles
Scientists found the first solid evidence colonists at Jamestown survived by turning to cannibalism. I hope to God that’s not where the brand “Pilgrim’s Pride” got started.
Dozens of dressed up CA teens traveled 40 miles only to discover they weren’t told the date of the prom was moved. The theme of the prom was “A Magical Night 2 Weeks from Now.”
A MN man claiming to be a member of Pink Floyd racked up $100,000 in unpaid medical bills. Staff knew it wasn’t true because when you played his EKG backwards, you didn’t get any secret messages.
The Stiles Files for May 10, 2013
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©2013, The Stiles Company, LLC
@TheStilesFiles