Apr 17

George WashingtonGeorge Washington was voted by Brits as the greatest enemy commander to ever face them.  The Revolution was called “the worst defeat for the British Empire ever,” especially by someone wearing a wig with a pretty ribbon in it.
(The Real Story) 


 

CasperA NJ couple is suing their landlord because they say the place is haunted.  They should have kept their mouths shut.  Now the landlord’s countersuing for having more than the accepted number of people living in the house.
(The Real Story)  


 

ObamaThe Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inducted Guns N’ Roses, though Axl Rose didn’t show because it “doesn’t appear to be somewhere I’m actually wanted or respected.”  Hey, that didn’t stop Obama from going to the Summit of the Americas.
(The Real Story)  


 

old manAn ad featuring senior citizens simulating sex acts by SaferSex4Seniors.org is to promote condom use.  The real trick was getting the seniors unstuck from those positions.
(The Real Story)


 

plumberA man tried to rob a central NY bank with a toilet plunger.  He didn’t realize he’d have made more money as a plumber than he could have ever stolen from the bank.
(The Real Story)


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)
©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com    @TheStilesFiles

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Mar 16

Bridget JonesObama and British Prime Minister David Cameron agreed on the plan to withdraw forces from Afghanistan by 2014 and keep pressure on Iran over its nuclear program.  They also agreed there shouldn’t be any more Bridget Jones movies.
(The Real Story) 


 

Home ImprovementPrince Harry says sometimes he and Prince William wish they were just normal instead of royals.  If he wants to be completely ignored, maybe he should disguise himself as one of the child actors from “Home Improvement.”
(The Real Story) 


 

mammothSouth Korean and Russian scientists are planning to bring the woolly mammoth back to life using an elephant egg.  What you’re left with is a mammal that’s terrified of mice but can at least stab them through the heart with their tusks.
(The Real Story)  


 

cowDairy cows everywhere are mourning the loss of “Jocko,” the world’s 3rd most-potent breeding bull.  He left behind as many as 400,000 kids after a 17-year career.  Jocko’s favorite move was “the milkshake.”
(The Real Story)  


 

Mary Todd LincolnBobblehead dolls of Abe Lincoln assassin John Wilkes Booth have been pulled from the Gettysburg visitor’s center bookstore as being inappropriate.  Guess the Mary Todd Lincoln “Wacky Taffy” isn’t going over well either, huh?
(The Real Story)  


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)
©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com    @TheStilesFiles

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Feb 22

mobile videoYouTube is creating tons more original programming since 18-34 year olds are watching video on phones, tablets and computers.  What’s sad are the ones who watch the same video over and over on their phone and complain there’s nothing on but repeats.
(The Real Story) 


 

wedgieA growing number of teens and even younger kids who think they were born the wrong sex are getting support from parents and docs who give them sex-changing treatments.  These include getting an atomic wedgie in PE.
(The Real Story)  


 

cowThe world’s first “test-tube” meat, a burger made from a cow’s stem cells, will be produced this fall.  No way!  Before I eat a burger I demand to know who the father is!
(The Real Story)  


 

Chris TuckerBritain is facing a “massive” rise in antibiotic-resistant blood poisoning caused by E.coli, bringing closer the possibility of diseases impossible to treat.  Officials say the diseases resist antibiotics like Chris Tucker resists taxes.
(The Real Story)  


 

Elton JohnElton John came down with a nasty case of food poisoning in Vegas and had to cancel a show at Caesars Palace.  His stomach was so bad, he was lighting candles in the wind just as a courtesy to those near the restroom.
(The Real Story)  


 

Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  http://www.notoriousdadmusic.com

 

(The Blog Monologue delayed 24 hours for radio clients)
©2012, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com    @TheStilesFiles

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Feb 01

(Delayed 24 hours for radio/TV clients)

A professor at the Medical University of SC, Vladimir Mironov, is trying to grow meat in a lab.  He envisions football field-sized buildings manufacturing engineered meat.  Naturally, this comes as incredibly legitimizing news to Taco Bell.


Crown Jewels Condoms of Distinction is making special celebratory packs of condoms honoring Prince William’s upcoming wedding.  It bears the slogan, ”For those times when you get a wild heir.”


A study on cheating shows half of men would forgive their female partner’s infidelity, as long as it was with another woman.  Men saw a female partner’s homosexual affair as “an opportunity.”  And Charlie Sheen saw it as “a typical Saturday night.”


An expert warns we’re facing a chocolate ‘drought.’  Political unrest in the Ivory Coast, where 40% of cocoa beans are grown, has reduced the number of cocoa farmers.  In fact, they’ve been heard in their fields singing that old song of oppression, “Nobody Knows the Truffles I’ve Seen.”


British actor Henry Cavill will be playing Superman in the upcoming reboot of the franchise.  It’ll pretty much be like all the other depictions of Superman, except his only weakness will be dental floss instead of Kryptonite.


Check out Mike’s alter ego, white, middle-aged suburban rapper Notorious D-A-D in his full length CD “Bumpin’ in the Burbs”!  www.notoriousdadmusic.com

©2010, The Stiles Company, LLC
www.mikestiles.com

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